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Re: so you do what they told ya
Bob wrote:
> On Feb 17, 7:46 pm, Zynnoushes <s...@wicked.net> wrote:
>
>>Bob wrote:
>>
>>>On Feb 17, 3:54 pm, "Doug Donaghue" <ddonag...@access4less.net> wrote:
>>
>>>>"Zynnoushes" <s...@wicked.net> wrote in message
>>
>>>>news:45d74683@news.arctic.net...
>>
>>>>>Doug Donaghue wrote:
>>
>>>>>>"Bob" <bob0...@aol.com> wrote in message
>>>>>>news:1171696233.460098.115370@t69g2000cwt.go oglegroups.com...
>>
>>>>>>>On Feb 17, 12:37 am, "projectile vomit chick"
>>>>>>><projectilevomitch...@netzero.com> wrote:
>>
>>>>>>>>On Feb 16, 5:32 pm, Zynnoushes <s...@wicked.net> wrote:
>>
>>>>>>>>>projectile vomit chick wrote:
>>
>>>>>>>>>>On Feb 15, 10:36 pm, Zynnoushes <s...@wicked.net> wrote:
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>projectile vomit chick wrote:
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>>On Feb 15, 5:42 pm, Zynnoushes <s...@wicked.net> wrote:
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>>>projectile vomit chick wrote:
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>On Feb 14, 12:05 am, Zynnoushes <s...@wicked.net> wrote:
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>justify, dont you die
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>damnit i haven't listened to that since i quit drinking!
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>>>i had ita blasting on my big sounda system the other day whilist
>>>>>>>>>>>>>doing
>>>>>>>>>>>>>dishes n junk...sounded good
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>>i've been listening to nebraska public radio during the day....my
>>>>>>>>>>>>cats
>>>>>>>>>>>>dig chopin.
>>
>>>>>>>>>>>LOL... THIS IS NPR....
>>
>>>>>>>>>>I used to like getting drunk and listening to Garrison Keillor on
>>>>>>>>>>Sunday afternoons, ranting about Lutherans and Hotdish.
>>
>>>>>>>>>LOL. This week in the studio we are joined by our guest PVC...
>>
>>>>>>>>it was a lot more fun before ronald reagan....his reaganomics really
>>>>>>>>blew my mind lol- Hide quoted text -
>>
>>>>>>>>- Show quoted text -
>>
>>>>>>>Vote Bob for President! If you vote for me you can expect dramatic
>>>>>>>changes. Heres just a sample. God Bless America!
>>
>>>>>>>1. The motorcade will be expanded to include tanks,a marching
>>>>>>>band,juggling clowns,fire eating midgets,and platform trucks filled
>>>>>>>with strippers doin thear thang.
>>
>>>>>>>2. Afternoon naps in every workplace will be mandatory by law,and
>>>>>>>workers will be able to take up to 3 weeks hangover time a year.
>>
>>>>>>>3. Taxes on gasoline,ciggretts,and liquor will be eliminated in favor
>>>>>>>of a prohibitive new 200,000 percent tariff on cat food.
>>
>>>>>>>4. The Bureau of Alcohol,Tabacco,and Firearms will be reorganized and
>>>>>>>be given a new bold mission:to make sure that every American gets all
>>>>>>>the alcohol,tabacco,and firearms he damn well wants!
>>
>>>>>>>5.Last call will be abolished. Liquor licensees must stay open 24
>>>>>>>hours or forfeit their license and the rest of their booze to my
>>>>>>>administration.
>>
>>>>>>>6. Smoking marijuana will remain illegal,but the penalty will be
>>>>>>>reduced: The arresting officer will karate chop his open palm
>>>>>>>alongside the offender's face as if running down a hallway...then stop
>>>>>>>and bring up one palm ,simulating an approaching wall. Then they are
>>>>>>>free to go.
>>
>>>>>>>7.All presidential speeches will pause for a 15 minute intermission
>>>>>>>with monkeys on rollerskates
>>
>>>>>>>8. When pleadng a traffic ticket 'the cop was a real dick' will count
>>>>>>>as a valid defense.
>>
>>>>>>>9. To be eligible for foreign aid,a country will have to give up it's
>>>>>>>officail language in favor of English and declare ketchup it's
>>>>>>>national condiment
>>
>>>>>>>10. OUT:Lethal Injection IN: being chained to a giant wheel,smeared
>>>>>>>with entrails,and torn apart by a pack of wild dingos
>>
>>>>>>>DISCLAIMER: I found these plus others in an old notebook I found in a
>>>>>>>pile I was going through. I did not write all of these but can't give
>>>>>>>credit where deserved as I do not know who did. I'm sure I midified
>>>>>>>and compleatly invented quite a bit of them and did again as I typed
>>>>>>>them here...so it's as good as mine anyhow! 1 or 2 on here I thought
>>>>>>>would strike some of you ALSers as funny!
>>
>>>>>>>--
>>
>>>>>>>-Bob
>>
>>>>>>Why vote for the lesser evil?
>>
>>>>>>C'Thulu for President!!!
>>
>>>>>>Doug
>>
>>>>>hey bob that was actually funny lol.
>>>>>shshsh he sleeps right now doug, you know that.
>>
>>>>>--
>>>>>Knowledge is power, unfortunately nobody cares about what I know!
>>
>>>>>"And remember: two thirds of happiness...is penis"
>>>>>-Dennis Miller
>>
>>>>> .:s|0|z:.
>>
>>>>Hehehe. Are you *sure* he sleeps? Or is he just disguised as Hillory
>>>>God-Damn Clinton?
>>
>>>>Kewl sig, but my very favorite Dennis Miller quote is still, "Evian is just
>>>>naive spelled backwards." <g>
>>
>>>>Doug
>>
>>>DM is one om my favorite comedians....paid like 75 bucks to go see him
>>>a few years back and was pissed though. Between the HBO show he had
>>>and "the Off White Album" I knew pretty much the whole act word for
>>>word! I loved when he was commentating football...although I was
>>>appearently the only fan that understood a word he said!
>>
>>>--
>>
>>>-Bob
>>
>>>"My fault,my failure,is not my passions,but in my lack of control of
>>>them" -J. Kerouac
>>
>>>"I have not failed,I've just found 10,000 ways that don't work" -T.A
>>>Edison
>>
>>What the fuck is he doing nowa days after his lame show on MSNBC. I
>>think it failed because they tried to confine him on basic cable news
>>standards... he might work on Comdedy Cenral or just go back to HBO man!
>
>
> Not sure what he's doing now. Think he just went overboard trying to
> get that nice mix of current events and comedy he had on his HBO show.
> I mean he had a fucking trained monkey as a regular!
That was fucking lame (the monkey) I saw like the first two weeks of
that show and was just like WTF ARE YOU DOING DENISE?!?!?!
> I'd love to see him on comedy central....think with Stewart and
> Colbert,Miller would kinda saturate them as far as politcal comedy
> goes...I mean without the Rant John Stwert is pretty much CC's Dennis
> Miller.
>
I like John Stwert a lot. I'm kind of sad to see he doesn't get more
rant time because a lot of the new correspondents on the show suck. I
like that jason jones guy and the british dude, I think that
pakistani/indonesian guy might be funny (he is pretty new) but the show
just hasn't had the same over all quality since colbert left to do his
own. Remember when It had Mo Rocca and Colbert and Steven Carrell?!
Awesome. I do enjoy Colbert Report a lot, sometimes though it would be
nice to see Steven talk to his guests as himself instead of his char as
a pro pro republican.
>
>>I enjoy DM profound long winded witt as well. There's this episode of
>>the simposons where lisa joins mensa and one of the guys has a shirt
>>that says "C:/ spot run, run spot run" or something and she gets it and
>>another dude says that only a small percentage of people would get that
>>joke and they call that the denise miller ratio or something...because a
>>lot of what he says would go over the average persons head, i think
>>thats why he failed on the football scene, glad to know you enjoyed it
>>though!!!
>
>
> His rants were great! His HBO show was a big fav of mine at the time.
> I mean he it's listening to or reading Burroughs....defenitly floats
> stuff over my head from time to time but for the most part I get what
> he's saying or at least what he means by it.
>
> --
>
> -Bob
Thats the thing about his rants. he talks a mile a minute and sets up
this big huge thing with all these crazy refrences and imagery plugged
in to this one crazy point but they all tied together and it was funny.
3000 lb. Gorilla!
--
Knowledge is power, unfortunately nobody cares about what I know!
"And remember: two thirds of happiness...is penis"
-Dennis Miller
.:s|0|z:.
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